Danger: Props!

Well, just for a laugh. Derek Irwin, Fallen's prop master, will not be able to be on set as he's out of the country when we shoot. So he sourced all the urgent props for the short and gave them to a common friend to give to me. These are: a gun (a BB gun to be precise, a plastic replica, however very realistic), a bunch of envelopes with the NHS logo and that of a fictional legal firm, and a stash of drugs (fake... fake drugs, they are only props). I also had a suitcase with Kieron Jecchinis's costumes as I also needed to do a costume fitting with his body double as his character, at one point in the story, is in the same place in two versions of himself. So there I am, on the way back home, lugging a suitcase with men's clothes and in my handbag a gun and a stash of very realistic looking drugs. As I got into Waterloo station to get my train I saw a couple of cops searching a guy. I swallowed. I moved on. Luckily I look very innocent. If I had been there instead of that guy I would have had this conversation with the fuzz:

Fuzz: We need to frisk you. (well, they probably wouldn't say it like that, but I'm adding some drama)
Me: Sure officer... (wiping brow)
Fuzz: (finding pills) And what have we here?
Me: They are props, fake, I can take one to prove it...
Fuzz: No that'll be alright.. oh... (finding the gun) and what is this?
Me: Sir, another prop, sir...
Fuzz: Is it now? And what have you got in the suitcase? A fake dead body?
Me: No, no. Just clothes.
Fuzz: (opening suitcase) whose clothes are they? Do you lead a double life or something?
Me: No, no, they are props and costumes for a film. Look, let me take a pill (pops down a pill)... See, no effects! I'll show you the gun is just a toy, here, let me load and shoot... (loads, but before shooting she's knocked out by the fuzz who reaches for the handcuffs and then the radio)

Ok, maybe not like that... but that was running through my mind. Not to mention that I had also spent the morning filling clear plastic sachets with icing sugar, to stand for cocaine. Fortunately I didn't have those on me.